kittens and anatomy

While driving with the kitten in the car... The Boy: Chase is tearing my nibs apart! Mom: Your what? The Boy: My nibs! You know, my nibbles. [points to nipples on his chest] Mom: [snickers]

I never knew

The Boy: Dad, I know why they call your ear loafs your ear loafs. Dad: You do? Why DO you call your ear loafs "ear loafs?" The Boy: Because when you turn on your side, they look like pies.

Fifty Nifty United States

Boy: "Mom, I drew flags from different states today, but I only got to finish three of them." Me: "Which states did you draw?" Boy: "Texas." Me: "And what does the Texas flag look like?" Boy: "It has a blue stripe that goes up and down and has a big star in it and one red stripe and one white stripe that go side to side. But it's not as hard to draw as New Hampster is. For New Hampster, you need to actually draw a picture." Man, I love that he still has a few left in him.

Back To School

The pillow talk conversation I had with the Boy this evening: Me (asking about his teachers): So what do you like the most about Ms. May? Boy: That she's nice. Me: What do you like the most about Ms. Kristin? Boy: That she always wears these cute little skirts.

Irony?

Dad: Do you want to listen to this band daddy likes? They're called Noah and the Whale.

The Boy: Sure. But why are they called Noah and the Whale? That's not the story. It should be Jonah.

D: You're right. I guess maybe they're just being silly.

TB: Nah, I don't think so. It doesn't sound silly to me.

D: Well, maybe they're being ironic.

TB: Yeah...probably.

Marble Jar

Mom: Thank you for being such a good boy this month.
The Boy: You're welcome, Mommy.
Mom: See how fast your marble jar fills up when you are a good boy? Aren't you so excited to have your new fish?
The Boy: Yeah. Mama? The next time I fill up my marble jar, can I have a brother or sister?
Mom: Well, it's a little more complicated than that, baby. Mama might not be able to have another baby.
The Boy: Mom, all we have to do is go to one of those places that have kids that don't have mommies or daddies. You know, like in Annie? I think it's called the pound or somethin. Can we please get one the next time I fill my marble jar? Please?!

World's Greatest Dad?

Mom: Happy Father's Day early, "Daddy."
The Boy: Yes! Happy Father's Day!
Mom: Isn't Daddy the best in the whole world?
The Boy: Well...maybe not the best, but he is pretty good.